30 June 2010

I am simply torn between two different pieces of art that I want to submit that allows me to grapple with the ideas of the narratives we have been discussing in class. For the most part, I would say that both pieces are closely related and share a certain way of grappling with the scripts we have been assigned.

I have always been very interested in this idea of "suburban life" and the "ideal housewife." While I do agree that it was a much more prevalent ideal in the 1950s, I still believe it is highly circulated even today. I became sort of obsessed with the idea that we are conditioned to believe we must adopt this ideal without question, that is, getting married, having children, getting the house in the suburbs, when I started to pull apart why this is such a common narrative. I think in our society, mostly for women, we are taught to want as little as possible, to resign from having big dreams and realize that what we should want is a husband and children. In my own life, I have always been highly disinterested in ever having children, or even getting married. When people learn this about me, I generally always get the same responses, such as: "You're crazy! You're a woman, you have to have children." or my personal favorite, "Don't worry, eventually you will get baby fever and you will want a child." I have often wondered why people are so quick to judge my choices and why people believe that just because I am a woman, I want things like a husband and children. While I am sure those things are nice, I also want other things. And really, is that not okay?

My first text is something I have just started reading. It is called The Feminine Mystique by Betty Friedan. Admittedly, I am only about 100 pages in, but I find it simply fascinating. It seems to be the perfect text to break down these conditioned ideals of women only wanting a husband and children. While my favorite passage is perhaps too long to include in this already lengthy blog, I will insert just a small section, "We can no longer ignore the voice within women that says, 'I want something more than my husband and my children and my home.'" I think Friedan raises a great point here and really is challenging the script women have been given. I think it is important to note your initial reaction to this passage and then ask important questions. It makes me wonder, why do women ignore that voice? And really, is there something wrong with wanting more than those things? Does that make a woman a bad or ungrateful person?

My second piece of art that grapples with this question is the film Revolutionary Road. For those of you who have not seen this oscar nominated movie from 2009, I highly recommend it. The film is a great challenger to the ideal 1950s suburban life and raises such important questions and issues. Unfortunately I could not find the scene that I chose to focus on but I will include a link to the trailer(it includes the quote I am focusing on) and I will bring the entire scene into class tomorrow. The basic premise of the scene is that April (the wife) is telling Frank (the husband) that they should move to paris as a means to escape their mundane life. I feel in this scene, April is really challenging the "delusion" that once people get older they are supposed to settle down and stop living. April says the most beautiful quote with much more eloquent phrasing than I could conjure up to describe exactly how I feel. "No, Frank. This is what's unrealistic. It's unrealistic for a man with a fine mind to go on working year after year at a job he can't stand. Coming home to a place he can't stand, to a wife who's equally unable to stand the same things. And you know what the worst part of it is? Our whole existence here is based on this great premise that we're special. They we're superior to the whole thing. But we're not. We're just like everyone else! We bought into the same, ridiculous delusion. That we have to resign from life and settle down the moment we have children. And we've been punishing each other for it." I feel this scene will contain even more meaning once I show it in class tomorrow.